CONTENTS
1. Come to Jesus Daily devotional- Monday – Men and women in God’s image
- Tuesday – Men and women are different
- Wednesday – Submission that’s fitting in the Lord
- Thursday – Submission to God’s will
- Friday – Model relationships on Jesus
You can listen to the message at: Link for audio content
For more information visit: www.communitychurchputney.com
1. COME TO JESUS DAILY DEVOTIONAL
One of our goals as a church is to spend at least 20 minutes every day in prayer and worship out of the bible. I hope you find this devotional helpful toward that end.
MONDAY – MEN AND WOMEN IN GOD’S IMAGE
Genesis 1:26-27 Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.”So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.
As Christians, we have a very different vision of what mankind is from those of different faiths or no faith. We derive our lifestyle from the bible, which has been inspired by the Holy Spirit. God teaches us that He created men and women with equal worth. Wayne Grudem has written,
‘Any discussion of manhood and womanhood in the Bible must start here. Every time we talk to each other as men and women, we should remember that the person we are talking to is a creature of God who is more like God than anything else in the universe, and men and women share that status equally. Therefore we should treat men and women with equal dignity and we should think of men and women as having equal value. We are both in the image of God, and we have been so since the very first day that God created us. “In the image of God he created him; male and female he created them”’ (Evangelical Feminism and Biblical Truth).
Each of us need to know the beauty and dignity that we have from God. It’s also important that we learn to treat all other human beings - male, female, young, old… as those created in God’s image, and of great worth.
RESPONSE
Do you get your understanding of who we are and how we live from God? Take some time to meditate on the following text which speaks of our equality, no matter what our background, now that we are in Christ.
Galatians 3:26-28 So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptised into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.
TUESDAY – MEN AND WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT
Colossians 3:18-19 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
Yesterday, we saw that men and women are equal in worth before God; and ‘in Christ’ all divisions are broken down (Galatians 3:26-28). Another truth, that has become unpopular in recent decades, is that men and women are different and have different roles, particularly in Christian marriage.
Submission
There are many areas of life when submission is important – submission to a referee in sport, to the law, to our boss…and, ultimately, to God. As our text shows, it’s God’s design that the husband is the ‘team-leader' in a Christian household.
‘Wives submit’ – Hupotassó is to be subject, or obey. It signifies that the wife should voluntarily subject themselves to her husband.
RESPONSE
The voluntary submission of wives to husbands may be a thought that is new or difficult for you to hear. A helpful book on this is The meaning of marriage by Tim and Kathy Keller, or, a more general book is Countering the claims of evangelical feminism by Wayne Grudem; a quote from this book to finish,
‘Why should the woman submit at times like these? We must reject the “traditionalist” answer—namely, that “women are not decisive enough.” The fact is that many wives are more decisive than their husbands. So why are women called to this position? As I said, the answer to that question is another question: “Why did Christ become the one to give up the authority to the Father?” We don’t know, but it is a mark of his greatness, not his indecisiveness! Women are called to follow him here. But remember, taking authority properly is just as hard as granting it.’
WEDNESDAY – SUBMISSION THAT’S FITTING IN THE LORD
Colossians 3:18-19 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
Over the last two days, we have very briefly touched on the subjects of the equality and difference of wives and husbands. Today we will see that the submission of a wife to her husband does not take priority over her submission to Jesus. In fact, all authority is to be disobeyed that is not ‘fitting in the Lord’.
Submission that is ‘fitting in the Lord’
Firstly, Submission that is fitting is modelled on Jesus’ submission to the Father. This means that Jesus, not unbiblical thinking, is our pattern of humility and submission. Although Jesus is fully divine, He submits to the Father’s authority. As we read,
‘But I want you to realise that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.' (1 Corinthians 11:3)
Like Him, we are to submit to godly authority, and, in particular, wives are to follow the leading of their husbands.
Secondly, submission that is fitting means that one only obeys when what is being asked of you is in keeping with God’s will. Like Peter, we are to say, “We must obey God rather than human beings!” (Acts 4:29).
Submission to authority in marriage, or other relationships, is not outdated baggage that we must throw off because our culture has moved on. In fact, this statement challenged the social norms of the time where a woman was to submit blindly.
RESPONSE
Are you submitting in a way that’s fitting in the Lord? Are you submitting to ungodly thinking and behaviour that dishonour Jesus? Would you be willing to pay the price of disobeying authorities for your greater allegiance to Jesus? To wives - do you see that Christ-like submission to your husband is Christ-like and brings honour to Him?
THURSDAY – SUBMISSION TO GOD’S WILL
Colossians 3:17-19 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
As we saw yesterday, we are to submit to authority only if that authority is not leading us to disobey what we know to be God’s will. In marriage, or in any other relationship, where there is authority and submission, we are only to do things for which we can ‘give thanks to God the Father’. So, let’s briefly consider how we can know God’s will. If you desire to be a godly leader in any relationship, you must learn to seek God’s will.
HOW DO WE KNOW GOD’S WILL?
1. LET’S PRAY TO KNOW GOD’S WILL
- Pray about all decisions and ask God to speak and lead.
- Pray with a friend or leader and ask their advice; do they have any sense of leading from God?
- If married, it’s vital that you pray together about important decisions.
2. GOD’S WILL S REVEALED IN HIS WORD
- Prayerful study - Is it in line with the clear teaching of scripture?
- Does God cause any aspect of scripture to stand out that leans you toward a decision?
- As you listen to bible teaching listen for direction from God through what’s being said (1 Peter 4:11).
- If you are married, it’s important to study the bible about the choices that you are making.
3. GODS LEADS THROUGH PROPHECY AND PROVIDENCE
- The prophetic – Dreams, visions and prophetic words – God speaks in these ways. Do you have past prophecies that help?
- Providence - ‘Coincidences’, circumstances, provision, ‘open doors’
- All this needs to be weighed thoughtfully and prayerfully.
4. OUR DESIRES CAN POINT TO GOD’S WILL
- God’s leading can be as simple as an inner compulsion to do a certain thing. When possible, it’s good to get advice before taking action.
- What do you want to do? – A pointer to God’s will can be a desire that He’s put in you. Compassion is also a good pointer to God’s leading.
4. WISDOM WILL INFORM US OF GOD’S WILL
- What will this cost in terms of money and sacrifice?
- Does this opportunity fit with your gifts and capacity?
In seeking to hear God’s voice we are asking is it in line with the revealed will of scripture and are their multiple voices and circumstances that are confirming what’s in your heart? In the end, you will have to take a step of faith – you will have to ‘walk on the water’.
If one is married and either of the partners believes that God is speaking to them in a specific way, it’s important to seek God together. But, in the end, the husband has to take responsibility before God for the decision that they are making, and the wife should willingly submit ‘as is fitting in the Lord’.
Example of submission to a husband’s leadership
‘In the late 1980s, our family was comfortably situated in a very livable suburb of Philadelphia where Tim held a full-time position as a professor. Then he got an offer to move to New York City to plant a new church. He was excited by the idea, but I was appalled. Raising our three wild boys in Manhattan was unthinkable! Not only that, but almost no one who knew anything about Manhattan thought that the project would be successful. I also knew that this would not be something that Tim would be able to do as a nine-to-five job. It would absorb the whole family and nearly all of our time. It was clear to me that Tim wanted to take the call, but I had serious doubts that it was the right choice. I expressed my strong doubts to Tim, who responded, “Well, if you don’t want to go, then we won’t go.” However, I replied, “Oh, no, you don’t! You aren’t putting this decision on me. That’s abdication. If you think this is the right thing to do, then exercise your leadership and make the choice. It’s your job to break this log-jam. It’s my job to wrestle with God until I can joyfully support your call.” Tim made the decision to come to New York City and plant Redeemer Presbyterian Church. The whole family, my sons included, consider it one of the most truly “manly” things he ever did, because he was quite scared, but he felt a call from God. At that point, Tim and I were both submitting to roles that we were not perfectly comfortable with, but it is clear that God worked in us and through us when we accepted our gender roles as a gift from the designer of our hearts.’
(Keller, Timothy. The Meaning of Marriage (pp. 157-158)
FRIDAY – MODEL RELATIONSHIPS ON JESUS
Leadership and compliance are not attributes that have come into existence because of sin. They are eternal features of God Himself. Of course, sin can pervert these good things, just it can in any area of life, as we read in Genesis 3:16,
‘To the woman he said… Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.”
Kevin DeYoung explains the meaning of this as, ‘she will sinfully desire to master her husband and he will sinfully tend to dominate her.’
How do we respond to this? The answer is to seek God’s wisdom and model our relationships according to God’s character and will rather than to reject God’s design.
The relationship of Jesus to the church is a model
Paul holds up the relationship of the church - as she submits to Jesus - as the great example of how wives are to follow the leadership of their husbands. He writes,
‘Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Saviour. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.’ (Ephesians 5:22-24)
In response, one may complain, “well, of course, it’s easy to submit to Jesus because He’s perfect and my husband isn’t!” Yes, that’s true, but do you not see that to reject God’s design of authority and submission is to refuse to submit to Jesus who, as you say, is perfect!
The relationship of Jesus to the Father is a model
We end this week’s consideration of authority and submission in marriage by looking at the most important example – that within the members of the Trinity. Paul writes of the Father’s authority over Jesus,
‘But I want you to realise that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.' (1 Corinthians 11:3).
Jesus is not diminished in some way, and neither are we in our relationships of submission.
In Philippians 2:5-11 Paul teaches us that our relationships are to follow Jesus’ pattern of love, humility and obedience. We read,
‘In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death – even death on a cross!’ (Philippians 2:5-8)
Now, this is not specifically about marriage, but, it is about Jesus’, who, although being equal with the Father, He submitted to the authority of the Father in His suffering; wives get to be like Christ as they submit to the authority of their husbands. Kathy Keller writes, after reflecting on this passage,
'If it was not an assault on the dignity and divinity (but rather led to the greater glory) of the Second Person of the Godhead to submit himself, and assume the role of a servant, then how could it possibly injure me to be asked to play out the “Jesus role” in my marriage?… Let me emphasise that Jesus’ willing acceptance of this role was wholly voluntary, a gift to his Father. I discovered here that my submission in marriage was a gift I offered, not a duty coerced from me.’
RESPONSE
How do you need to respond to this week’s teaching?
If you are single and want to be married
We may not understand God’s design for a wife submitting to her husband’s authority, but I hope that you see that it is God’s will.
If you are single and want to marry, it’s important to seek someone who desires to obey Jesus like you do, so that if you are leading or being led, you have the same objective - to live for Jesus.
If you are single and don’t want to marry
Let's remember that Jesus was not married! There is a gift of celibacy (Matt. 19:12; 1 Cor. 7:7). Those unmarried have great benefits; there is immense capacity that is released for you to serve God and His people. You are much more flexible to serve God in many ways. But let’s never forget that we are all in the relationship to which all marriages point to - the relationship between Christ and His church. As Paul writes,
‘This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.’ (Ephesians 5:32)
If you are single, enjoy God’s gift and the love, as a husband to His wife, that He has for you.
If you are married
I encourage you to think about the contents of this study together. Are you seeking to know and serve God personally and together? God’s plan for marriage only works when Jesus is the Lord of our lives.
Further study
A helpful book on this is The meaning of marriage by Tim and Kathy Keller, or, a more general book is Countering the claims of evangelical feminism by Wayne Grudem.
2. COMMUNITY GROUP/FAMILY STUDY
TREASURE THE FAMILY PART 1
Read Colossians 3:18
Opener - In what teams have you been in where leadership has worked and why?
Introduction
This week we have been considering, principally, God’s design for how a wife is to relate to her husband - he is the 'team leader' in a marriage. This is a hugely contentious issue that we should all understand even if we are not married.
Discuss together
- Read Genesis Genesis 1:26-27. The Bible teaches that Men and women are created in God’s image. Why is this important for healthy relationships of any type?
- Read Ephesians 5:22-24. Men and women have different roles in marriage. How is the relationship of Jesus to His church used to teach the different roles of men and women in marriage?
- What does Colossians 3:18 teach us about how a wife’s submission is given, but never taken?
- Paul writes of ‘Submission that is fitting in the Lord’. How does this protect a wife, or any of us in our relationships where we are under authority, from doing things against God’s will?
- We must only lead or follow in what we know to be God’s will. On Thursday we looked in detail at how one can know God’s will. Why are knowing the bible and praying vital if we are to know God’s will so as to lead or allow ourselves to be led?
- Read Philippians 2:5-8. Jesus sets us the greatest example of being led by His Father. How does Philippians 2:5-8 teach us that we can be equal whilst submitting to another?
- Read1 Corinthians 11:3. How does the relationship between husband and wife mirror that of God the Father and God the Son?
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